relaxing
here we see the verandah: the place where I now spend a lot of my time, looking breathing reading sewing thinking dozing; wondering.
the sunshine helps a lot of course, helps to relax and enjoy living; on our way to Turkey last month I bought Sue Townsend's 'the woman who went to bed for a year', thinking it was gonna be a laugh like the Adrian Mole series, as it turned out I hardly read at all but exercized a lot, the holiday was a very physical experience!
The book's about a 50 year old woman who gets into bed the day her twins have left for university, she has decided she wants 'out' and has a lot of thinking to do. I didn't feel like reading it whilst on holiday and only started reading it yesterday; it is almost like a blue print for my feelings these past few weeks...how extraordinary
I love reading; I love reading about peoples' everyday lives, being in their heads, learning how they cope
hair's okay; me looking in direction of terns |
Tungsten sniffing right after his bath |
Bram drinking |
the other day we saw a toad crawl out of this hole (in between tiles in the path up towards the house) he popped out his head, noticed us watching and scurried off into the bushes |
Comments
that at some point, and when would
that be?, but at some point we
become a changeless self. and
maybe even, some might think we
Should be a changeless self.
and i supposed we can. and i supposed some of us do. but i
think that it is Developmentally
Correct that change continues and
maybe never stops. i use becoming a mother as my point to look back to and since that time, i think
really, there have been 6 significant changes, and now am
living the 7th.
the entity that we come into this world as, continues. i look back
and the me of a very young child
remains, but i have morphed. and
too, i think between the movement of changes, often there can be a time of drift, of pause, of redefining, conscious some, but most unconscious.
I like what Grace had to say too.
developmentally correct, hahahaha LOL considering change to be developmentally correct somehow validates it all, makes it even more worthwhile, change encompassing growth that is, spiritual, intellectual emotional growth, whatever you want to call it.
One detail struck me in this book about the woman in bed for 1 year (finished today btw) what it boils down to between people is that we all need kindness, kindness for oneself, kindness towards others.
Yes kindness, I sighed to self, remembering when as a teenager not wanting to be considered 'nice' as in a nice girl, aspiring to be 'me' a person recognised as a seperate being, separate from parents, family, friends even, just a human being....not really grasping what that meant.
Anyway, looking at life now - looking from a reasonably comfortable spot in the world, I do realise just how priviledged I am and how petty my thoughts may appear - looking at my life, the lives of those close to me, it is rather a wonderful thing that is happening, this coincidental gathering of stardust, that we may have met and continue to share our thoughts and feelings and all we make and do or sometimes don't do.
I feel grateful
in an email, either way, i want
to know what happened to the woman
who stayed in bed....i clicked the
link and read the first two chapters offered and find her on my mind.
what happened????