Friday, 30 December 2016


a growing collection, some have gone, more are added on a regular basis

 not what you would call a proper winter, up until this morning that is: we wake up to blue skies and white splendor....we go for a walk, traipsing through a magical world; you know magic never lasts and as the temperature rises steadily the sun's rays have the trees dripping white icicles, as we return home all goes green and brown once more

As always thinking way too much whilst walking, on such matters as 'why do what I do?''why bother?' knowing there aren't any real answers to these kinds of the other day a friend visiting in the studio mentioned she could see how I was on a search, the individual pieces are in fact studies for whatever....yes, that is it

fragments of thought:
the studio is more and more a reflection of self, imperfect & unfinished - which is a good thing, for only death brings finality - 
talent is, as I see it, stretching (beyond) the bounderies of one’s limitations....
How I ‘work’: by association, never a proper plan, I just start, get going.... one thing inevitably leading to another, often unrelated, but somehow circling towards the same goal
expression, impress, breathing, non-verbal communication, communion
happy new year

Saturday, 24 December 2016

wishing you all a Jolly Cactus Gathering

 whilst celebrating the Jolly Cactus Gathering* our friends thought it opportune to announce the arrival of yet another being in their midst: Harry the hairy lion; he gave me quite a fright as I unwrapped the gift from Jude there he suddenly was: a stowaway hidden among the fabric scrap-bundles in an envelope from the States; turns out he's a very gentle and kind lion, the kind we all can live with here!

* never a specific date: it occurs as the mood takes them, this year it happens to coincide roughly with christmas and solstice

the Unthanks performing 'King of Rome' nice tale......

Tuesday, 6 December 2016


what it looked like and how it is slowly becoming something else:

warmer, earthier, more me
more tactile

there are so many spaces for everything I make and find; I have decided to call self a 'maker' rather than an artist (although there's nothing wrong with that of course)
what I like about this word 'maker' is that it is the same in English and in Dutch ánd means the same thing as well; will have to make (haha) a new business card!

the general idea is to cover up most of the white panelling right down to the floor, covering up those bricks as well; I might add a layer of white wash to make it more uniform and lighter, have not yet quite decided, isn't finished so all the more reason to wait; couldn't resist hanging stuff all over the walls though, I tend to do that: move in the decorations before things are finished; will also be using those beautiful wooden floor-tiles on the floor, eventually it will be a true treasure

late afternoon Sun

p.s. have been kind of absent here, yet again due to dental ill-health issues,....switched dentists as I no longer trusted my former one, will not bore you with my physical woes and sufferings (I can be quite a drama queen in pain!) Suffice to say I collapsed last Sunday onto the sofa and called in sick for this week, still have a root canal to look forward to on Saturday, anyway am in safe hands once more

Thursday, 24 November 2016

another seemingly uneventful thursday, or was it

 raking leaves in the backyard, 
removing leaves from the low table, carefully,
knowing the bird is there;
then finding yet another one, just a bit further on the path along the house, almost hidden by the fallen leaves
this time a fresh body,
maybe the storm last weekend 
still has eyes

 making small cushions these days;
I find it comforting, making these soft objects;
something to do curled up on the couch next to the husband watching tv

the one on the left is filled with bird feathers, from birds he has shot and we have eaten; I have decided I want to use the entire animal, not just the meat.

I had imagined making a BuddhaBird, something very simple: a small bird skull on a stick, stuck in a chunk of wood, fat-bellied;
I saw him sitting on top of this particular cushion; I had assumed he would choose this one, because of the feathers.
other side

he chose this one with the full moon; he himself turned out different too: a skull hot-glued onto a stick, in turn hot-glued to a shell, it was a painful, messy process, much like birthing is; he complained a lot, was upset and not zen like at all; neither was I, feeling guilty for making him suffer, yet going ahead anyway

he came out okay I guess; I had already made this small cape-wrap-around snippet of clothing, not especially for him, but it fits perfectly; he has accepted the single feather 'makes you look smart' we all said to him; even though he's a BuddhaBird I find him difficult, not easy-going, then again I probably had unrealistic expectations to begin with

glowing in the spidery lights

on top of his moon amidst his new room mates

another Jude inspired project

Sunday, 13 November 2016

birth day

last evening, it cannot be a coincidence, I made the baby, he turned out smiling and curious; the very early hours of the 13 November twenty years ago our eldest was born, not a coincidence then

 this collage, what I like to call my Buddha collage, has been hanging there for quite some time now, you know how you stop noticing something and then suddenly do, again not a coincidence as I am listening to the video 'The Tibetan Book of The Dead' you can click on the link over at Grace's 

 was also listening to the Beatles, today especially to John and George, how their songs remain relevant

am planning on adding an extra layer to the studio walls: more insulation and making better use of these wooden planks, they've been outside and need to dry

a calming video: husband performing part three of Tai Chi set

Saturday, 12 November 2016

r.i.p.: ode to a tiny toad

not only did we find leaves & mushrooms, 

we also happened upon a small shrew, 
dead alas, however still very beautiful, 
so wrapped in a leaf it came back home with us

'I did my best, it wasn't much
I couldn't feel, so I tried to touch
I've told the truth, I didn't come to fool you
And even though
It all went wrong
I'll stand before the Lord of Song
With nothing on my tongue but Hallelujah'
Leonard Cohen 1934-2016

one morning I noticed this flattened tiny toad
on our path leading up towards the house
suggesting it was one of us who had
trampled him the night before
whilst walking in the dark
not noticing the small critters crossing
from flower-bed to the shelter under the bushes

some shelter, huh,
now he is gone forever

I cried then
and I cried today as I stitched all the small objects onto the cloth
stitched underneath and over his tiny armpits
and maybe I also cried a little for myself and everyone else after a week of upset and turmoil
who knows

I remain hopeful

I am basically an optimist

hallelujah by Jeff Buckley 

Sunday, 6 November 2016

autumn has a lot to offer

leaves hanging by a thread

grateful for holding water
I think he's thinking: 'as long as I keep my eyes shut, there's no one there staring at me and taking pictures of me as I mind my own business; I sincerely hope she's gonna bugger off soon, pardon my french'
grateful for small encounters

grateful for food our land offers

grateful for a safe haven

introductions are made

 last friday I was in town with my close friend M. and we happened to meet a beautiful white goat; I liked her straight away: just look at those hiking boots and her rucksack-basket, those horns! of course I immediately thought of Grace and her goats. We got to talking, one thing led to another and I can tell you she has a sweet and gutsy personality and has purposely travelled here to meet us. She knew about everybody here in The Dwelling, so she decided to walk the roads, track the trails, hike through the woods and over the mountains, alone or when her path crossed a fellow traveller heading in the same direction, she shared the road ....Her name, and I know some of you will be familiar with her, is Snowbunny
Grace and I believe she is a reincarnation, goat Snowbunny's to be precise

the small birds who flew here last year all the way from Julie's place, have fallen in love with Snowbunny (then again, who hasn't) and this one seems determined to live in her basket

grateful for kindred souls